Rejection and Acceptance

Some good news on the horizon at last. Disney turned out to be my best show ever. And I’ve been accepted for Images in New Smyrna and Naples National.

I did some talking to other artists at Disney about acceptance and rejection and I learned some things about myself. While I’ve always been an artist, it is only in the past few years that I have been displaying and selling my photography. So I’m a late comer to this world of acceptance and rejection. One artist explained to me that we wear out hearts on our sleeve and hand an ice pick to every customer that walks into our booth. A hundred people can come into my booth and tell me my photography is wonderful and one walks in and says something negative. Guess which one I will remember and turn over and over in my mind?

Although… Those negative comments have sometimes been very helpful. I remember one very clearly. I had been complaining about my poor sales on a photography forum I belong to and someone responded, “That’s because your work looks like everyone else’s”. That stung for a long time but it also caused a major shift in my photography. For the better, I believe.

On the other hand I found this quote about compliments by Chazz Palminteri -

“Oh, great reviews are the worst. They mislead you more than the bad ones, because they only fuel your ego. Then you only want another one, like potato chips or something, and the best thing you get is fat and bloated”.

I remember my first award. It was one of my first shows and the judge walked in the booth and pointed directly at one of my photographs and said “that one”. It was a complete surprise and I just barely found the awards ceremony in time to hear my name called for honorable mention. There was no stress, no pleas to God. I try purposely to get back to that place when the judges come by and the awards are announced but it is too late, I’m addicted.

Which leaves me with this quote by Ray Bradbury:

“You have to know how to accept rejection and reject acceptance.”

A new day

Feeling much better today. Sometimes I am so ungrateful I wonder why God doesn’t come down and slap me. The Disney people are really nice. The setup is difficult though. I didn’t even bother to try to get to the unloading spot. You still have to dolly and if you’re going to dolly you might as well do it slowly. Some really nice work here. Looking down the names of the photographers showing here I can forget about winning an award here. I’m honored just to be among some of these people. There is a ten foot bear sculpture that is magnificent. Not sure where I’d put it though.

After this it’s a free weekend and then off to Virginia to see family for Thanksgiving. I should be able to get some photo time too.

Arghhh

Well, I did Lake Mary this past weekend and it was not exactly like the Lake Mary I remember. The location has changed but that’s a good thing. But they’ve increased the number of booths, almost double and decreased the number of awards, removing all of the honorable mentions. I wrote on the survey that they didn’t need to try and be a big shot art show, that they were doing just fine as Lake Mary.

And I’ve been thinking (dangerous words there) maybe that advice applies to me as well. I just got my sixth rejection in two weeks. Another big shot art show doesn’t want me. And I’ve had lots of work chosen for judging, almost every single show I’ve been in, and the last time I got an award at an art show is now more than a year. I’m discouraged, but why does some judge’s opinion bother me so much if I am truly doing what I feel called to do. I seem to have lost my purpose. This is the biggest dip the roller coaster has taken. On the bright side I seem to be selling pretty regularly. The public seems to like my work. But that’s not enough. That’s not why I started doing this.

I came home Saturday night very discouraged and I needed to send out my artist statement to a potential buyer. I stopped to read it. I wrote it several years ago, dreamy idealistic words, that I don’t feel I am living up to, but I’m not sure how to proceed.

Maybe this is just the economy talking, or five shows in eight weeks talking, and I’ll feel better in a few days. God will send the answer, just not on my timetable and like any good human being I want it now.

Stay tuned.